Tuesday, January 16 2018 07:28 pm

That Damned TV’ll rot your brain!

(Originally from Friday, February 29, 2008)

Hello again! Well, I’m back and thoroughly refreshed from my visit on the big island, Hawaii. Nothing like being around the birthing of an Island to bring perspective on things. Though I can say I don’t miss those damn frogs.

So, once again I feel compelled to write. I was on the freeway this evening when I came upon this truck. Model and make are immaterial. Through its back window I could clearly see a screen showing some movie. Now understand, this is not the first time I have seen this. I find myself rationalizing how a law for the use of cell phones exists; yet, one can still possess what amounts to a home theater system in their car. This makes no sense!

These things are playing while someone is driving; yes I know they come with headphones, yet it is a rarity that I see someone wearing them. Bet the batteries ran out! The screen is positioned so the driver can’t watch. So what (Remind me at some point what I want to say about headphones) So, you know, bombs going off, people screaming… somehow the driver isn’t the least bit distracted?

Now before someone who knows me says “But, Zen, you own a car that has one of those!” Yes, I do, and I have a good explanation! I never wanted it. It was acquired from my brother in-law, in trying to help him out of a difficult financial situation, hence, here it is. To my credit I have never used it, nor care too. Although, from time to time I’ve had this fantasy of being on a hot date, driving deep into the woods amongst the bears and squirrels, commencing to fondle and grope each other while watching some hot porn. Bears applaud, squirrel’s blush. Now that sounds cool, and never during any of that would I be driving. The car, anyway…

Maybe more importantly is the issue that family values may have forever officially washed down the proverbial toilet. What’s the matter Mom? Dad? Whoever you are! Can’t have a meaningful conversation about life or how was your day? Kyra, Bobby, Billy and what’s your name? Or maybe have some deep conversation about what’s going on in our world? Explain to those confused kiddies how a guy who’s never had a real job in his life, snorted coke, and is basically a raging dry drunk, somehow got to be president. That ought to take up a good few hours!

I don’t know, I guess on long trips videos could be handy, but a drive to the local market? Geez! Guess the kids got to watch The Little Mermaid for the billionth time. I remember telling stories or just bonding, occasionally throwing up, but only on long drives (Something about facing backwards in that ole station wagon). Anyhow, mostly I remember mom or dad telling us stuff about our history or their parents and past, giving us clues to where they, and we, came from. Telling jokes. Dodging dad’s backhand when we were out of control.

Now, it’s sitting mindless like good little robots being brain sucked by some flashing lights and music telling us when to laugh, cry, or be mad. Uhggg! Oh man that reminds me of that commercial I just saw (I know! I know! I get caught up in it too!). There’s this family who has no connection to each other dad makes them all go for a ride to drive around and watch TV or movies in the car and get closer. Makes me want to puke in my own living room. Yeah, GMC is bringing families closer together while polluting the environment, all at the same time. Now there’s your special two for one deal!

While we’re on commercials, let’s get serious for a moment. Not too long ago I was in Vegas. Yes, Zen loves to play Poker occasionally. Anyway, I pulled into this gas station and thought I was blasted right into a Blade Runner movie. Jesus! Multiple screens with advertisements on the gas pump! What is wrong with these people? Can’t I have a moment to myself? Can’t I just smell the toxic fumes in peace? It gets worse… I was at a checkout stand in Arizona. Same thing: T.V. advertisements. Seriously, this has got to stop! First, noise pollution now its advert-pollution. Give us a break! Honestly, I will never buy a product from anyone who uses that medium, just to prove a point. Man, it makes me want to pull an Al Capone on the next advertiser I meet. Let’s see, do I have any baseball bats lying around?

You know what started this? It’s the damn mute button and TIVO, that’s what did it! Too many people not wanting to hear their sex lives, lifestyles, homes, cars, kids, bodies and minds aren’t good enough. Or 1 out of 3, 4, 7, 12 will die of something, somehow, someway, someday, and there is nothing you or I can do about. Why? Because even the answer will blind you, hurt you, cause any number of emotional distresses and/or a variety of other ailment’s including the failure but not limited to just one of many organs, or just simply kill you. Then again it may do absolutely nothing, but that’s a lie, because it will cost you your money so you still lose and that’s another pain in the ass.

They make cars that can go 160 miles an hour, yet the speed limit here is 70, tops. What the hell is going on? Madness, I tell you, and it’s being shoved right down our throats. When we tune them out, change the channel or hit the mute button they’ve got to find us… Stalkers, they are! Commercial stalkers out for that buck, worse than the crack dealer. At least those guys have a corner to hang out on! Pretty much anyone who wants to find them knows where to go. They’re not hanging out in my living room trying to sell me something every ten minutes that I don’t even want! They go where the business is, not where it isn’t.

I imagine that’s why the home video industry is so huge. Except, what is with this? I can’t fast forward for those first few minutes? See, again, it’s like making you watch when you don’t want to watch. That’s called holding you hostage, and that tactic sucks, because there is no one to hold them accountable, or put them in jail for invading my space, my mind, my childrens minds, my friend’s minds. But I bet if someone finally loses their mind, it might be considered.

Again! Where is my bat?

~Zen Twist.

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